I Just Wanna Be a Better Man

“You are my ‘stuff’ guy.”

“You’re so fucking handsome.”

“You might be my smartest friend.”

“I think the thing that connects everyone here is how much they love Jesse.”

These are all things that I heard from (somewhat) unexpected sources as 2015 turned over to 2016. Each is true to a degree. I know how to make things work; I checked myself out in the mirror at the tail end of puberty and decided I was attractive enough; I am now and have always been a smart guy. I am certainly loved.

So why do I also run myself down to the point where I also heard this:

“Can you make it a resolution to be nicer to yourself this year?”

I want to. I’m trying.